08 Sep Golfing jargon for next time you’re on the course…

If you’re about to head for the links and you’re out to impress your boss, your client, your mates or that committee member who’s vote is vital to you, here are a few golf-thentic phrases you can drop into conversation as you navigate the course.

Your playing partners will be left in no doubt as to your grip on the finer points of the game…

A Diego Maradonna – a totally unpedictable five-footer
A Salman Rushdie – an impossible read
A Rock Hudson – thought it was straight, but it wasn’t
A Cuban – needs one more revolution
An Adolf Hitler – two shots in the bunker
A Yasser Arafat – ugly and in the sand
A Gerry Adams – playing a Provisional
A Rodney King – over-clubbed it
An OJ Simpson – got away with it
A Princess Grace – should have taken a driver
A Princess Di – shouldn’t have taken a driver
A Ladyboy – looks like an easy hole but all is not what it seems
An elephant’s arse – high and shitty
A condom – safe but didn’t feel real good
An Anna Kournikova – looks great, but unlikely to get a result
A Vinnie Jones – nasty kick when you’re not expecting it
A sister-in-law – up there but I know that I shouldn’t be

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